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The Bi Men Network presents
"Wednesday's Child"
Bi themed essays by Bi Men Founder "Mac"
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Places of Assignation vs. Designation
and Bi MEN Today

Dear Bi Men Members:

Indeed  a fitting topic this week as this week we are offering the members free access to which is a vast web paysite that lists thousands and thousands of places to meet for sex (and where some have sex) - across the entire known universe (i.e. all earth)!

MEN are as we all know different from women. As Jay Leno often jokes: "Women need a REASON to have sex! Men just need a place!"  There is far more truth in that for the bi and gay man than many of us might care to admit.

A main MISSION and PURPOSE of our Bi MEN NETWORK is to help you as a member to meet other bi guys and gay men who like and understand bi men.

I am not of the CLOSED LOOP CREED where certain zealous bi guys believe or want to believe that they can have one marriage with a straight-hetero WIFE and another "sacred union" one on one with ONE bi/gay man on the other side.

MEN are like alley cats! FACE IT!  It is just asking for trouble to PROMISE and VOW to be faithful to ONE WIFE and to just ONE GUY! Lord! Why would anyone take on such double-duty in one lifetime? I guess some ARE punishment gluttons!

Do NOT get me wrong! It SOUNDS nice.

In a perfect world all three of you could live in the same lovely mansion with a nice garden, maze, riding stables, swim pool, dock on the lake, yacht, private petting zoo for your cheaper by the dozen brood and a GREEN CARDED live-in au pair nanny and butler who are sterile eunuchs with no kids of their own. All of you in perfect health, happy as clams!

BUT men just want a place to have SEX.

SO that gets us to the MEAT of this TOPIC today - Places of Assignation vs. Places of Designation. What is that some of you may ask?

The point is - when you come to AN ADDRESS FOR SEX - this weekend on our free 3-days at that site - and if you join it - or if you routinely check out such listings - on the net or elsewhere - ALWAYS - ask yourself - when you do go to such a LOCATION - is this a place to HAVE SEX or to MEET FOR SEX???

SOME PLACES are both - as gay saunas and baths - or private sex clubs! Even in those locations - be sure that they have a good relationship with the local police and authorities so you do not get caught in a raid or otherwise arrested!

MOST PLACES are however - Places of ASSIGNATION - where you can make A SIGN - i.e. signal you are looking for bi or gay sex - and want to DO IT - NOW or as soon as possible.

AND that is the PROBLEM. Often we are all so HORNY - that by the time we get to that PLACE - our penis is raging hard and has a mind of its own. Well keep it zipped up and go somewhere else - or even make a date for later! Or go have a drink or cup of coffee and artfully "interview" your prospect!

PLACES OF DESIGNATION - all too often lead to UNSAFE SEX that put you and your wife and family at risk - even if it is a case of crabs - body lice - that you take home! It is hard to ask a "gentleman" at a gloryhole his HIV status and his safe-sex practices. Once his gorjuicy piping hot member is through the gateway to heaven and in your eager mouth - your mouth may be full and it gets impolite to inquire into his sex history, sexual practices, and current HIV status - and to ascertain that he is indeed STD FREE as you'd genuinely prefer him to be! INDEED!

AND - once he has shot that big wad - he like most creatures - will flee and leave you without his contact info and he just might have been the man of your dreams - now he may just turn out to be the "man of your screams" = who gave you GOD knows what!

Here at the Bi MEN NETWORK we encourage our members - bi and gay men alike to TRY to make personal connections here via our Chat Room; INTRODUCTIONS; events/meetings; and our Central TRAVEL DESK. Check out our A to Z Guide for making better man to man personal connections at: - OK!

BUT boys will be boys and we all from time to time - are in a rush; or are just plain very HORNY; or are in a strange or new city or area - and that is when sites like come in handy.

BUT remember - at ANYTIME you are considering having SEX with a stranger ask yourself - have I checked out this guy as a playmate? Is this a safe place to have SEX - is this a place to have sex? Is it a place of ASSIGNATION as MAC said or a place of DESIGNATION. Maybe we should get a tad acquainted and move somewhere else.

NO quick sexual gratification is worth AIDS - or VD - or arrest or humiliation or a mugging by street types who prey on bi and gay men having public sex.

ASK YOURSELF - would you have sex with a wanton woman at this location? Consider if children or the public might just happen upon you in the ACT at the location. Move on. It is not worth it.

MOST bisexual and bi-curious MEN are open to some nervous chitchat and conversational foreplay. Be aware that often persons who do  CARRY the HIV virus or ETD's (or just do not want to know their health status) often do prefer anonymous public sex or quickie no talk sex. Having this kind of sex is RUSSIAN ROULETTE on many levels - health-wise; personal safety and security; blackmail; public arrest and humiliation; etc. etc. etc.

DO NOT GO DOWN THAT ROAD. IF you are cruising in such locations be very careful and move away from those areas for a drink or coffee or just chat in the car. Always try to think of some reasonable explanation if you find you must offer one as to WHY you are there.

DO NOT LOITER - no one has a reason to spend three hours or so at a public toilet. KEEP ON MOVING. 

Often here - the guys tell me it takes TOO MUCH time to post an Introduction and carry on with the emails and then meet. BUT - if you found one hot bi men sex partner who might be a buddy it would certainly be worth it! And just how many hours do you spend week after week - month after month cruising around for a quickie? I can assure you my "regulars" are important to me both as good sex partners and as friends and are a vital part of my life today!  I for one do not miss the time I wasted for years in bars, baths and bookstores. The hidden agenda of the OWNERS of bars, baths, and bookstores is:  "Seek but do not find!"

They want you back again and again and again - looking for quickies - nursing drinks or getting drunk night after night. They want those dirty videos running over and over. They want you back at
the baths again and again for random and anonymous sex. NONE of them want you to make a sex buddy or friend because you won't be coming back all the time to FILL THEIR COFFERS.

I don't know if they still call them "wrinkle rooms" - but to see the end result of this 3 B's "Gay" Lifestyle go to a gay bar where all the older men hang out. NOTHING sadder to me than to see what decades of drinking to the seek but do not find THEME. Or the old guys hanging around public parks and rest rooms.

SO again - when out on the prowl - ask yourself this question:

"IS this a place of assignation or designation???" Would I have sex with a woman here? Would I want a cop to come across me here having sex? MOST of the times - you will realize it is better to make CONTACT and move away from this LOCALE.

The kind of person you DO WANT TO MEET will understand and will respect you for having a COOL HEAD and will move on with you. OR next time he sees you he will likely recall you were a cool head and THEN will be more at ease to move away to continue your acquaintance.

NO quickie is worth ARREST - no poke is worth AIDS - NO BJ is worth taking home crabs to your entire family (as I once did as a teenage boy).

SEEK AND FIND - but remember - take this ASSIGNATION to a safe and secure place to ACTUALLY do the dirty deed. Even if you have to pay for a sleazy motel that is far better than ????????? (your worst nightmare).

Be happy - have fun - play safe - make a friend here at the Bi MEN NETWORK.
Best Wishes!

Stewart (Mac) McCloud
Now over 250,000 guys with us today!

++++++ TRICK and TREAT - at Bi MEN:

Happy Halloween at the Bi Men Network and if you are still with me - go NOW to:

USER NAME:   bimennetwork
PASS CODE:    goodbiguys

ENJOY! *********** "MAC" **** Semper Fi

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